What? Don't look at me like that.Liiiike you have never felt the same way about a sandwich before?
Come on..you have never held a SILF in your hands?
Never wanted to do a little !@$%^ *cough* sandwich fondling?
Never touched a sandwich worth fondling?
Never wanted to get a little deli?
Well, I have and do so on a bi-weekly basis. I have a sandwich that I am hooked on like Lindsay Lohan is on spray tanner and Samantha Ronson.
Here is my SILF:
What?She is not that kind of SILF.
She tries to have modesty and cover up.
Ok. Fine. Here she is exposed, posing for my salivating mouth:
Oh yeah those are real..not fake. 100% real American cheese. All natural turkey. Don't believe me? Well here she is close up. Try to not lick your monitor screen. She is taken:
This is homemade, thick white bread, mayo, mustard, pickles, cucumbers, American cheese, yummy..juicy turkey meat.My poor daughter was not allowed to part take in my SILF. Not allowed to touch her. She had to make do with this:
Poor kid don't know what she is missing out on. But I ain't sharing in on this sandwich fondling!The only things missing from my SILF is sprouts...since the health department has outlawed them here! Mutiny!! I ♥ sprouts. Oh and maybe throw in avocado slices. Heh..that is a SILF!
In other hussy related food worth fondling news. The was out to dinner last week with girlfriends at our favorite restaurant. We love the avocado egg rolls. They are EILF's. Mmmmmm. Anyway..as I was looking through the menu..trying to branch out. Pick something new. I came across a piece of meat. Meat after the own Hussy's heart:
In the middle, the Asado Borracho (DRUNK STEAK)! Sweet CREAMED CORN!!! More reason why I love this restaurant!So tell me about your SILF's? What is/are/would they be? Don't be shy..we all have sandwich fantasies! Let your inner deli out!
Ohh, and don't forget to go here for my Slang Word of the Week contest! See if you are straight street, and to find out who won!
186 comments:
Monday my son made a SILF. As I read this post, I recognized all of the signs. It was 3 big slices each of turkey and ham, piled high lettuce, tomatoes, pickles, mayo, mustard, cheese and oh yes BACON!
I had one while I was eating it. If I had had avocado, I would have somehow manged to get that in there too! It was very messy. So messy in fact I think, I think it had one, because it was turned on by me eating eat
damn now I'm hungry again.
Creamed corn?
Wouldn't that be CILC?
(Corn I'd like to cream?)
Not that I know anything about that.
Mine's the club at a local mom-and-pop store. Homemade bread, mayo, lettuce, cheddar, ham, turkey, tomato, bacon, and it's stacked high, and cut into quarters..
I eat half, and take half home for later.
The perfect "now 'n later" meal.
My SILF is QUILF, and it's referring to queso (which I gave up for Lent). Yeah, I love it THAT much. It's not only my QUILF, it's my kryptonite, my Yoko Ono...
I've been around the blocks with sandwiches, I like BLT's, fried chicken patty, and cold cut sandwiches. Yum yum yummy yumm. They all need the standard mayo, yellow mustard, lettuce, tomater, pickle I treat 'em right too. I'd also have fun with a meatball sandwich on toasted wheat bread. :)
My SILF has got to be thick slices of fresh roast beef on a french roll, with mayo, Swiss, Italian dressing and me. The only problem is the wet spot on my side of the bed.
Forget the mayo and mustard. I found a new spreadable love.
Jalapeno ranch dressing.
I'm salivating!
Dizzbld- ohhh, that is A SILF I could get my hands on ...minus the tomato..ewwww. Messy only means more SILF-y.
Mooog- You can fins a sexual innuendo out of a rock. Very talented you are!
Jormen- Oh yes!! Yummy..again minus the tomato. Mine is from a mom and pop store on homemade bread to! It also is so thick and big..I save the other slice for later to. WOW, we should meet for lunch sometime!
ScandlousHOuse- Lent huh? Wow that is a QUILF! My thoughts are with you through this difficult time in your life.
Lady Sarcasm- LOL! you treat the right huh :) I kinda have a thing for sweet mustards.
Ettarose- Ohhh a SILF that dirties your sheets! What a good time! I love homemade roast beef sandwich the day after a roast..heated up with may and bread.Yummy!!
Cold Italian sausage leftover from previous day's BBQ, sliced in half, on rye with bacon, cheddar cheese, lettuce, mayo and dijon mustard with a side of pickle and a pickled egg.
Mmmm...cardiac attack
Lady, you had me at "SILF!"
MWAH-HA-HA!
XO
A.
The Frisco Burger from Hardees. After eating one on a Monday, I'd be layed up in bed till Friday.
It's an extremely slutty Silf with a ton of butter in the buns. i haven't had one in a year, and I'm still suffering from withdrawal.
Sure my heart is better for not touching the nasty thing for so long, but my soul aches...
Sorry, I got all distracted after reading about the Drunk Steak & Creamed Corn sammich....that sounds like a sanwiched someone already F'ed!
Quirks- Jalapeno ranch dressing? I am not sure I am on board with ya.
nonamedufus- That is a new one..may have to try it. Sound good.
Anna Lefler- What? Speechless? You? Never.
CB Jones- Never had one. Sounds like a hospital charge waiting to happen. Stay strong!
Suburbia steph- Oh it wasn't sandwich, but it could be. Maybe yo have a new idea on your hands??
Are you spying on me? Do you know my corrupt sandwich fetish? Was that you sitting in that all night resterant at 1AM as I scarfed an amazing tuna melt? I knew you weren't reading the paper! Maybe it was the hour. Maybe it was the fact that I'd drug a cranky toddler three hours in a vehicle and still had three more to go. Maybe it was the swanky bathroom that buttered me up before I opted on dinner. No matter what... that was one of the best Tuna Melts I've had in a long time. Almost worth packing up the toddler and driving 3 hours back there... ALMOST!!
Chicken salad with pecans and grapes on a crusty roll. 'Scuse the drool.
say, i like that sandwich. which one of these buttons on the monitor turns the smell on?
I do appreciate your enthusiasm, Jamie!
My sandwich to beat all sandwiches-- which I don't have often because it is a heart attack waiting to happen-- is a hot roast beef sandwich with gravy all over it and the side of french fries....
OHHHH the joy.
I cried a little when I read this. Thank you.
My latest love is bahn mi which is a Vietnamese sandwich. So good.
Real Life Fairy- BUSTED! I am now google to see if they have any SILF self help groups. LOL
Frippery- Hmm..that is a new one. Never Hear of that combo!
Nooter- Sorry. Out of luck you are. What? Trying to get that poop of your nose still?
Jen- Enthusiasm at it's best. I still have yet to try your SILF. Maybe one day.
Captain Dumbass- Did you have a good cry? All out? I hope it was a good cry.
I am afraid I will need a picture to get the full idea.
When you explained what a SILF was, I knew right away. In fact, I had one yesterday - a black angus beef sandwich at Quizno's. Actually, it's that sauce that does it for me. I wish I could buy it by the gallon and bathe in it.
Karyn
You have a High Five from me HERE.
Yum! Excuse me while I get a napkin to clean my monitor.
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