Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Another Frank Constanza moment.

You know, a Serenity now, Serenity NOW" moment like this one from the good ol' post files. Interesting enough this one also involves my lovely dog. Do you see a pattern here? Maybe the dog needs to go bye bye, don't let the door hit you in the ass on your way out, don't call me I'll call you, Qosh sau bolyngdar, Sau bolnynyz, Sau bol, Sayonara, AdiĆ³s, Good Bye, See you later, Take care, Until Next Time (umm maybe not this one.) You get the point?

Nooo, all you animal lovers, I do love him and he is my responsibility. I took him on, so I must follow through, even if it is my own demise or sanity in the end. But sometimes can't I picture my peaceful (I am sure it would be) life without him? I am sure that is the ONLY solution to regaining my sanity, right? Or maybe no dogs, some Zoloft, booze and counseling could do the trick? I am sure we will never know.

SO on to the latest installment of the Lord Louie book:

Chapter 2: Louie Snoring = No sleep for Jamie.

That is right, my English Bulldog snores. Not just a sweet, cute snore. A very loud, obnoxious snore! It was a great way to kick off my Monday, I tell ya. So needless to say I didn't get a very good night sleep. Louie's dog bed is at the end of the hall, and he usually stays there all night. For some reason (conspiracy to make me crazy), he decided half way through the night to go lay in front of my door and saw logs all night! I woke up several times to the sound of him making cord after cord of wood. Enough to last all winter. But I had that, "I am too tired to even get up and do something about it" problem. At least until it was 6 am, I finally got up and told him to go on his bed. By that time it was to late to catch up on rest....time to start the week off in true Louie style.

I now know what my husband has been complaining about. See since my first pregnancy, I started snoring and it has not gone away. I know it it is because I need to loose the rest of my baby weight. But since my latest addiction to Strawberry Jello Pretzel Salad, I am afraid he will have to continue to suffer.

So I decided to videotape his snoring so you could really get the full effect. Turn up the volume, you don't want to miss this. The video starts and ends with a good loud one, and in the middle I fear he may be suffering from sleep apnea! He looks like he is not breathing and killing what few brain cells he had left! HELP!


I may need to research and see if I can get him some "Breathe Right Nasal Strips" for him so I can sleep. More blogging on Louie to come.


Ange~ said...

I'll say this- you have not heard my dad snore! At family camp, he kept people awake 6 cabins down from us. But he has sleep apnea- so he has a machine now.
But for a dog, that is really loud. I thought he was going to die in the middle of that video there. Breathe, Louie!
Oh, and I love Jello pretzel salad...but there's a good reason we only make it on holidays...I'd love to eat the whole pan!

Bfun1 said...

THAT IS SOOO FUNNY - I almost wet myself! I think he actually did stop breathing in the midst of his snoring....either that or he stopped breathing to listen to his surroundings! GOSH THAT IS FUNNY! I know why you have problems sleeping with that noise now! HILARIOUS!

Jamie said...

Ange- I am cracking up because my dad is the same. He snores soooo loud you can hear him a mile away. He also 5 years ago got on a sleep machine. We should introduce them, they would hit it off! Their is a reason why you should only make JPS at holiday's, and I am finding that out right now...mmmmmm. I can eat the whole pan too!!

Brenda- I hope you appt. when OK:)) Also, did you not get my warning on depends?? Sounds like you needed to get a pair.

As for Louie, I fear he went a few too many minutes with out taking a breath. I may need to ask the vet if that is normal. His snoring is one of the reasons we had to get a fan to sleep!!

Andrea said...

How hilaroius...I kind of miss those dog noises...but not enough to run out and buy a new dog. I do have a husband that is much just as loud. I have to kick him each night to make him roll over. Once he does that it's all good!

Ange~ said...

Andrea, what happened to Abby?

Jamie said...

Does abby snore?? You need a fan!

Andrea said...

Not sure what happened to Abby....we're you talking about the snoring or the dog thing??

Ange~ said...

Andrea- didn't you used to have a dog named Abby? What happened to her?

Andrea said...

No...our dog was named Mocha, a chocolate lab. She got bone cancer in the fall and we had to put her down in Novemeber. A week before Jamie lost Blitz. Very sad! We has had her since before Riley was born. She was our first baby! And although I don't miss some things like her shedding hair, etc. we do miss her! We are going to wait to move into our new house and then get another dog...probably something smaller this time thought. Maybe a puggle...a cross between a pug and a beagle. They are so cute!!

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